The Ultimate Guide to In-Home Childcare: How to Hire Nannies, Nanny Shares, Au Pairs, House Managers, Mother’s Helpers, and Babysitters
- Sarah Davis
- Nov 30
- 6 min read
For the mom who needs real clarity, real options, and real support.
By Sarah Davis, Olive You Nanny Founder
Finding reliable in-home childcare can feel overwhelming, especially for working moms navigating long days, unpredictable schedules, and the constant mental load of family life. Whether you are comparing a nanny vs an au pair, exploring nanny share options, calculating nanny cost, or simply trying to figure out how to find a trustworthy babysitter, the search can feel daunting. Many parents aren’t sure which childcare option fits their lifestyle, what nanny interview questions actually matter, or how to run background checks for nannies and sitters.
This guide breaks down every major childcare pathway clearly and thoughtfully so you can understand your choices, evaluate candidates with confidence, and choose the best childcare solution for your family’s needs.
Understanding Your Needs Before You Start Your Search
The childcare search becomes much easier when you can clearly identify what kind of support your family needs. Every household has a different rhythm, and understanding yours is the foundation of choosing the right caregiver.
Ask yourself:
• Am I overwhelmed most days, even when I plan ahead?
• Do I need childcare, household support, or a combination of both?
• Do I want long-term consistency or a more flexible arrangement?
• Am I looking for support because of work, burnout, logistics, mental load, or all of the above?
• Do I have space in my home for a live-in caregiver such as an au pair?
• What is my realistic childcare budget?
• Do I prefer someone who becomes part of our family or someone who remains more separate?
Your answers will naturally guide you toward the right category.
Nannies: Personalized Care and Long-Term Support
A nanny provides consistent, personalized care within your home and often becomes a trusted extension of the family. Whether part-time or full-time, a nanny brings structure, developmental support, and professional experience that adapts to your child’s needs and your home’s daily rhythm.
Nannies are ideal for families seeking reliability, individualized attention, and support for infants, multiple children, or complex schedules.
Pros
• Personalized, consistent childcare
• Predictable routines
• Support with child-related tasks such as laundry, food prep, tidying, and outings
• Experienced guidance through milestones and developmental stages
• No commuting children to daycare
• Flexible scheduling
• Nanny can grow with your family through multiple children
• Kids can participate in activities, classes, and outings
Cons
• Typically the highest-cost childcare option
• Requires active communication and relationship-building
• Can take time to find the right match
• You are legally considered the employer
Legal and Financial Responsibilities
When hiring a nanny, you become a household employer.
You must:
• Issue a W2
• Follow federal and state labor laws
• Pay employer payroll taxes
• Pay overtime for more than 40 hours/week
• Carry workers’ compensation insurance where required
Services like The Nanny Playbook help parents understand these responsibilities and set up a compliant employment relationship.
Nanny Shares: Two Families, One Nanny
A nannyshare is when two families hire one nanny together. It’s an excellent way to lower costs, give your child a built-in playmate, and still receive high-quality, personalized care. Successful nannyshares rely on strong communication and compatibility between families.
Pros
• Split cost between families
• Kids have a built-in playmate
• More affordable than hiring a nanny alone
• Expert support from a professional caregiver
• Kids can enjoy outings, classes, and routines together
Cons
• Nanny has four bosses instead of two
• Requires clear communication and alignment
• Both families are considered employers
• Coordinating schedules, holidays, and sick days happens across two households
House Managers: Support Beyond Childcare
A house manager is ideal once children are in school and parents need help managing the home’s daily operations. House managers typically arrive midday to handle household tasks before school pickup and afternoon responsibilities.
Pros
• Household laundry
• Meal prep or cooking
• Grocery shopping and errands
• Organizational projects (closets, pantry, playroom)
• Overseeing home maintenance and vendors
• Managing family schedules
• Picking up children from school and taking them to activities
• Highly flexible support
Cons
• Higher hourly rate than basic childcare roles
• Usually requires access to the family car
Au Pairs: Cultural Exchange and Flexible In-Home Care
An au pair is a young adult from another country who lives with your family and provides childcare in exchange for room, board, and a weekly stipend. Au pairs bring cultural exchange, flexibility, and a unique relationship dynamic that works well for many families.
Pros
• More affordable than full-time nanny care
• Flexible weekly childcare hours (up to 40 hours depending on program)
• Cultural exchange and language exposure
• Often eager to participate in family routines
Cons
• Must provide a private bedroom
• Typically younger with limited childcare experience
• Cannot work outside program hour limits
• Upfront program fees can be significant
• You cannot meet them in person before committing
Legal and Financial Responsibilities
Au pair programs are tightly regulated.
Host families must:
• Provide a weekly stipend
• Contribute to the au pair’s educational requirement
• Follow capped childcare hours and schedules
• Provide a private bedroom
• Comply with all U.S. State Department program rules
Accredited agencies like Cultural Care and Au Pair in America guide families through all requirements.
Mother’s Helpers: Extra Hands When You Need Them Most
A mother’s helper is ideal for families needing an extra set of hands with both kids and household tasks — especially when a parent is home. This role offers flexible, affordable support for busy families, especially those with newborns or multiple children.
Pros
• Flexible hours
• Helps with laundry, dishes, tidying, meal prep, and organization
• Reduces mental load and daily overwhelm
• Great short-term or transitional support
Cons
• Often students or part-time workers
• Not always professionally trained in childcare
• Not ideal for solo infant care
• May not be a long-term solution
Babysitters: Flexible, Occasional, and Short-Term Help
Babysitters are perfect for date nights, appointments, weekends, or occasional coverage. This is a low-commitment option that provides reliable breaks for parents without the cost or structure of full-time care.
Pros
• Easy to book
• Budget-friendly
• Great for evenings and weekends
• Ideal supplement to other childcare arrangements
Cons
• Availability varies
• Experience levels differ
• Not ideal for families needing long-term structured care
Where to Find Nannies, Nanny Shares, Au Pairs, House Managers, and Babysitters
Reliable childcare comes from reliable sources. Strong options include:
Professional Nanny Agencies
Agencies like Olive You Nanny and Chicago Nannies, Inc. provide vetted candidates, background checks, reference verification, and thoughtful matching based on parenting styles and family dynamics.
Online Platforms
Care.com, Sittercity, and UrbanSitter let you post jobs, review profiles, and filter by experience, skills, and availability.
Local Parenting Groups
Neighborhood Parents Network, MamaTribe Chicago, Facebook mom groups, and Nextdoor often yield trustworthy community-based recommendations.
Au Pair Agencies
Cultural Care, AuPairCare, and Au Pair in America manage visas, training, and program compliance.
What to Do Before You Hire Anyone
Intentional preparation leads to better hires and longer-lasting relationships.
Interview With Purpose
Ask about childcare philosophy, discipline, routines, safety, communication preferences, personality, and “nanny style.”
Check References Thoroughly
Call three former families and ask about reliability, strengths, challenges, and whether they would hire the caregiver again.
Run a Background Check
Screen identity, criminal history, and driving records when applicable. You can run one easily at www.nannyplaybook.com.
Understand Pay and Market Rates
In Chicago, nanny rates average $28–$35/hour depending on experience and duties. Mother’s helpers and sitters vary. Au pairs follow regulated stipends.
Offer Competitive Benefits
PTO, paid holidays, guaranteed hours, bonuses, and healthcare stipends make you a preferred employer in a competitive market.
Set Clear Expectations
A nanny is not a housekeeper. A mother’s helper is not a full childcare provider. An au pair is not a household manager. Clarify exactly what you want before interviewing.
Do a Trial Day
Observe interaction, communication, instincts, and overall comfort. Chemistry matters.
Questions to Ask Yourself While Deciding
• What kind of support do I need most: childcare, home management, or both?
• Do I want someone experienced or someone energetic and creative?
• How much structure do I want for my children’s day?
• Does full-time care fit our budget?
• Would a live-in arrangement feel comfortable for our family?
• What relationship do I envision with this caregiver?
Questions to Ask Candidates During the Interview
• What ages of children have you worked with most?
• How do you approach discipline, emotional regulation, and big feelings?
• What does a great day with a child look like?
• What does a challenging day look like?
• What communication style works best for you?
• What would previous families say about working with you?
• What are your strengths in childcare?
• Are you open to feedback, collaboration, and shared parenting philosophies?
Final Thoughts: Trust Your Instincts
When you meet the right caregiver, you often feel it immediately. Trust the gut feeling that tells you something is right or not. If you find a great match, move quickly. The childcare market is competitive, and incredible caregivers are in high demand.
About Sarah Davis
Sarah Davis is the Founder of Olive You Nanny, a full-service nanny agency with over 25 years in the childcare industry. She began as a nanny before launching the agency in 2005 and has supported thousands of families across Chicago, Austin, and Atlanta. Olive You Nanny is known for relationship-centered, thoughtful placements rooted in trust and aligned values.
To empower families everywhere, Sarah also created the Nanny Playbook, a step-by-step resource that helps parents hire and build strong nanny relationships independently. She is a trusted voice in national parenting publications and a frequent speaker at family and childcare events.
Thanks for having me!!
Xo
Sarah